Why I Just Can’t w/ HB…
Why I Won’t Shop at Hobby Lobby (And Yes, It Feels Great)
This may give away a hint into my personal outlook on life - basically - mind your own business, don’t be an ass to others, and corporations / billionaires / the government should maybe not make decisions about life, liberty, and the pursuit of PERSONAL happiness. Of course, unless, making others suffer and miserable is your idea of a good time…(which, crikey seems like it is for far too many people…)
Look, I’m not naïve. I know most corporations have a little grime under their perfectly manicured, brand-strategy-approved fingernails. We live in late-stage capitalism; purity is a myth, and if we boycotted every morally dubious company, we’d be naked, hungry, and crocheting with grass clippings.
But even in the land of “all corporations are kinda bad,” Hobby Lobby manages to be… exceptional. Like Guinness-Record-setting exceptional. Like, “wow, other corporations have to stretch before trying to compete with this level of scandal” exceptional.
So yes, I’ve NEVER shopped there. At first because there wasn’t one to shop at. And now, because I can just flip it off with my bags of money as I drive by. And yes, it feels phenomenal.
Exhibit A: The “Who Among Us Hasn’t Accidentally Trafficked Ancient Religious Artifacts?” Era
There are bad business decisions, and then there’s accidentally importing thousands of ancient artifacts smuggled out of Iraq. Hobby Lobby apparently looked at the world’s archaeological heritage and thought, “Cute. Put that in our break room.”
The U.S. government did not agree.
Long story short: investigations, controversies, forfeitures, the whole nine yards. Honestly, it was giving “Indiana Jones villain but make it corporate craft store.”
Exhibit B: Healthcare? For Women? Perish the Thought.
Then came the Supreme Court case—the Hobby Lobby that argued that a corporation (a corporation!) had religious beliefs strong enough to deny certain contraceptive coverage to women.
Their logic?
“We can’t provide people healthcare we don’t agree with because of our deeply held spiritual convictions.”
My logic?
“I would like my employer and corporations I have ZERO affiliation with to stay out of my uterus - or prostate - or anywhere…”
We are simply not compatible.
Exhibit C: The ‘We’re Staying Open During a Pandemic Because… God’ Moment
Most of us remember COVID as the time when we were panicking about disinfecting groceries and the world felt like one giant preschool runny nose.
But Hobby Lobby? They reportedly decided that staying open during lockdowns was totally fine because the owner felt divinely inspired about it. That’s…certainly a management style. Not one I want anywhere near my crafting budget, but a style nonetheless.
Meanwhile, Michael’s Is Over Here Just… Selling Yarn
I’m not pretending other companies are spotless. I’m not living in a fantasy world where every craft store chain treats its employees like treasured woodland creatures frolicking through a fair-trade meadow.
But Michael’s doesn’t seem unhinged, which—wildly—is enough to earn my loyalty these days.
The bar is on the floor, but at least they didn’t trip over it while carrying a crate of illegally imported cuneiform tablets.
And Honestly? The Boycott Has Been Delicious
I have spent thousands of dollars elsewhere—yarn, beads, fabric, paint, entire aisles of glitter—and not a single penny at Hobby Lobby. Every time I drive my dogs to the groomer and pass their store and keep going? It’s like exfoliating my conscience.
“We can’t boycott everything!” you cry. Correct. But we can boycott the ones that behave like chaotic neutral prophets with a glue-gun loyalty program.